Vandalism!

My car is dirrrty! Yes I put some extra "r's" in there. That's how dirty my car is. I don't think it's been washed since October maybe September. I've been trying to get my car washed since 1/1/2009. But something always happens to prevent it from getting done i.e. weather, laziness, forgetfulness. This week I had to take my car to the dealership to get my rear tire replaced. When I made the appointment online, I made sure to note that I want my car washed. When I called to confirm my appointment, I made sure to tell them that I wanted my car washed. When I bought my car back in 2007, I bought the VIP Service Package. That meant I had free oil change and filter change, discount on parts and labor, free inspections, tire rotations, and car washes and a plethora of other stuff that I can't remember. I haven't taken advantage of any of the VIP amenities that I have paid for. So when I dropped off my car I made sure to tell the fella at the service desk that I needed my rear tire, driver's side, replaced (I drove over a nail and was slowly losing air. Of course the nail was on the side of the tire and they couldn't plug the hole. Thus having to get a brand new tire.) And I told him that I wanted to have my car wash. I dropped my car off at 7am so they were going to have my car all day. It might as well get cleaned while in their care.


I call the dealership around 3:30 that afternoon to find out if my car was ready. Of course it wasn't. It was next in line to get looked at. Seriously? I asked what time will my car be ready. They say 4pm. Ok. I'll be there around 4:30 to pick up my vehicle. I arrive at the dealership. My car isn't quite ready. Of course it's not. So I wait for another 10 - 12 minutes. They finally call my name. As I'm walking up to the service desk I'm thinking: They had better washed my car. And guess what? THEY DIDN'T!!! My car was still filthy dirty. I was not happy. I didn't make a stink about it because at that point I just wanted to pay and leave.


I go pick Darrius up at school and when I walk back to my car, this is what I see:

What kind of bird poop is this? It looks like mud. There's grass all in it. Completely gross. For some reason, this just added insult to injury. My car is already a dirty mess and then a bird goes and drops a grassy bomb on my hood! I guess I should be happy that I hadn't gotten my car washed. I would have really been pissed!

Yeah, Yeah I know

I've been lazy...again! No excuses for it. None whatsoever. I did run yesterday which I am happy to announce. But I'm still not being consistent like I need and should be. Yesterday I used the mini-gym at my job. I was bored sitting at my desk and decided to break the monotony by going to the mini-gym and working out. How sad is that? I went due to boredom not because I was gung-ho about training. I guess it doesn't matter what the reason is just as long as I went. I had a good workout - 30 minutes. I'm going to head back to the mini-gym today.

I promise to really get back on track next week. Next week is March and I haven't made any progress in regards to running. That is not good. The first 5k that I want to run is in April! Will I be able to do it? I hope so. We shall see...

Lent

Today is Ash Wednesday - the start of Lent. I'm not a super-religious person. I don't even know if Southern Baptists celebrate Ash Wednesday/Lent. I haven't been to church since we moved to Virginia back in 1985. I do believe in God and I do think religion/spirituality is important but I have a problem with "organized" religion. I think my issues with it stem from being brought up as Southern Baptist, having a preacher for a grandfather and going to church every Sunday and seeing the hypocrisy of the people sitting in the pews. It left a bad taste in my mouth. With that being said and despite my religion issues, I decided it would be a good idea to give up a "vice" for Lent. I used to do this every year but fell off the wagon about 5 years ago. I figured I'd give it a shot this year. This goes along with my 9 goals for 2009. Things I want to do to make me a better person. So I've decided to stop talking about people. Anyone who knows me knows that talking about and making fun of people is my thing. It's what I do. It's how I get my laughs and kicks. But it's also not nice and I really need to stop doing it. And one day I'm going to be talking about someone and they're going to be right there. I've never been very discreet when it came to my trash-talking. My husband hates it. Especially since he says that I don't know how to whisper and that the person I'm talking about can probably hear me. Not good. And again - not nice.

I'm hoping I can stick with this beyond the 40 days. I am a nice person but I sometimes do not so nice things. I'm letting everyone know that I'm giving this up so if I slip up, I will be called on it. I tell my son all the time that it's not nice to talk about people. I think it's time I took my own advice.

Back on track

I've been M.I.A for two weeks but hopefully today is the first day of my return. Last week I was sick. I started feeling better this week but by the time I was ready to get back into the gym, I had a migraine...for TWO days! I woke this morning with remnants of my migraine but I ignored it. Nothing was going to stop me from going to the gym.

When I hopped on the treadmill, I felt like I was back at square one. I decided to take it easy so I walked for 3 minutes and ran for 2. I did this 4 times for a total of 20 minutes. I was winded and sweating by the time I was done but I was happy that I was able to do it. I didn't start feeling tired until the 18 minute mark which is good. After that I weight trained and then walked on the treadmill for another 2o minutes. I didn't want to over-do it and hurt myself.

I feel great and hope that nothing else happens to derail me!

Feeling "home sick"

I love Facebook. It's addictive. I log onto Facebook several times a day. I also love FB because it has reconnected me with friends that I thought I would never have contact with again. Friends that shared an experience with me that makes our friendship unique from any other. The friends I spent 2 years with in New Delhi, India. I remember when my dad first told me we were moving to India. I thought my world had just ended. All I could think about was what I would be missing; no driver's license, no prom, no graduating with my friends. I was so angry. When we first arrived in Delhi, it was culture shock beyond belief. The poverty, the heat, the smells. It was unlike anything I'd imagine. I'd convinced myself that I wasn't going to enjoy my time in India. I was determined not to like it. Why should I? I was forced to move and miss out on my junior and senior year of high school with my friends! I'm not going to make any friends while I'm in India. I'm not going to have anything in common with these people.

It was a shaky start. My first day at school, I felt like an outsider. My first thought was "where are the black people?" I mean seriously, where are they? How was I going to make friends with people I have nothing in common with? The kids I met had spent most of their life overseas. They were used to it. I was a newbie. This was my first time. We lived overseas when my dad was in the Air Force but I was a toddler. I don't even remember it so that doesn't count. The first month or so completely sucked. My hair was in a constant frizz thanks to the Delhi heat. Our townhouse on the compound wasn't ready so we were living in a house in town. So I had to take the bus to school - not fun - and kinda scary. When we finally moved onto the compound, things started getting better.

I started actually talking to the kids at school. I stopped judging them like I was sure they were judging me. I opened myself up little by little and guess what happened? I became friends with some great people. And my final years in high school wasn't the disaster that I thought it was going to be. I was more active in school in Delhi than I ever was in the States. I played volleyball, I was in the drama club (Stage crew baby!). I travelled to places I would never have had the opportunity to visit if we hadn't moved to India. I mean, who goes to Bangkok for Spring Break? Not anyone in Dale City, VA! My senior trip was to a beach resort in Thailand. Wow! When I realized the opportunities that living in Delhi gave me, I opened up to the experience more and more.

I remember our last night in Delhi. My parents' friends had a going away party for us. It was a lot of fun. I remember as it got closer to the time for us to leave, I started feeling sad. I hadn't expected to feel sadness. I thought I would feel excitement. I was headed back to the States to start my first year in college. Why am I sad? But I was. In the taxi, as we got closer to the airport, I started crying. My time in Delhi had come to an end. The friends I met and left behind I may never see or hear from again. When we first left the States to head to India, I didn't shed a tear. It was strange that the thought of never seeing my Delhi friends and never seeing Delhi again could make me so sad. But it did.

Thanks to the Internet and FB, I'm back with my Delhi friends again. So much time has passed and yet it feels like it hasn't. We've all grown up, gotten married, had kids. But when I chat with them I still feel like we're back at AES, hanging out at ACSA or the SU, chillin and being kids. I've always said that college was the best time of my life. But I honestly think it was the 2 years I spent in New Delhi that was the best time in my life. Or at least one of the best. That experience makes my friendships completely unique from any other friendship that I have. We share something that no one can understand unless they've been there. No one will understand what a rickshaw is, or why you don't want to get the Delhi belly. Or that it's normal to be taking a shower and see a gecko scurry across the the bathroom wall. This experience uniquely binds us.

And because of this, I'm feeling home sick. I never thought of Delhi and the compound as home, but for 2 years it was. And the friends I made were and are my family. I hope to someday be able to go back and visit. And I hope to be able to see my Delhi buddies soon. Chatting on Facebook is all well and good, but it's nothing like seeing them live and in person.

Almost back to normal....

This cold knocked me for a loop the last couple of days. I left work early Thursday and stayed home all day Friday. I had a low-grade fever, congestion out the ying yang and a cough. I mostly slept and stayed in the bed. Saturday I started feeling a little better. I'm glad because Saturday night was the Sweetheart's Ball and there was no way I was going to miss that! We bought the tickets months ago! Thanks to plenty of rest, Tylenol cold medicine and nose spray, I was well enough to go to the Sweetheart's Ball with my sweetie. And I had a blast! The open bar helped a lot too. :-)


I am now 95% better. I have some left over congestion that should be gone in a day or two. Now hubby's sick and he claims it's my fault. Whatever! Hee-hee.

Bitten by the cold bug

I woke up this morning with a scratchy throat. I brushed it off thinking my throat may be scratchy because I slept with my mouth W-I-D-E open. ;-) But I decide to pop a couple of Halls in my bag anyway - just to be on the safe side. As the morning progressed, my throat started getting scratchier and my nose started running. I had the sniffles. I thought about my husband's cold remedy - workout and sweat it out. There's a mini-gym at work so I decided to head there and try to "sweat out" whatever was trying to ail me. I worked out on the elliptical for 30 minutes and had a nice, good sweat. I took a hot shower with plenty of steam and headed back up to my office. Lunch time rolls around and I have no appetite but I decided to eat anyway. I noticed that I've barely touched my water due to my throat being so sore. I go to the kitchen and fix a cup of tea - wishing I had some brandy or whiskey so that I can add a little kick to it. My grandfather called it "eye". I had to settle for honey instead. The tea soothed my throat but I was still sniffling and started to feel achy.

By closing time, I felt like crap. I could barely muster up the energy to walk to the metro. The ride home was miserable. I picked Darrius up and once I got home, I crashed on the couch. I've gotten up a couple of times to fix dinner and use the bathroom. And grab my laptop. I have to stay connected to the world.

I have a slight fever - 100.2 - not bad. My throat is still sore and I have a dry cough. I'm cold and my eyeballs feel like they are on FIRE!

Please, oh please, don't let this be the flu. Unfortunately, there's a flu outbreak in Virginia. I didn't get the flu shot. I'm just keeping my fingers crossed that this is the common cold and I'll be feeling fine in a couple of days.

KEEPING FINGERS CROSSED!

Bitten by the cold bug

I woke up this morning with a scratchy throat. I brushed it off thinking my throat may be scratchy because I slept with my mouth W-I-D-E open. ;-) But I decide to pop a couple of Halls in my bag anyway - just to be on the safe side. As the morning progressed, my throat started getting scratchier and my nose started running. I had the sniffles. I thought about my husband's cold remedy - workout and sweat it out. There's a mini-gym at work so I decided to head there and try to "sweat out" whatever was trying to ail me. I worked out on the elliptical for 30 minutes and had a nice, good sweat. I took a hot shower with plenty of steam and headed back up to my office. Lunch time rolls around and I have no appetite but I decided to eat anyway. I noticed that I've barely touched my water due to my throat being so sore. I go to the kitchen and fix a cup of tea - wishing I had some brandy or whiskey so that I can add a little kick to it. My grandfather called it "eye". I had to settle for honey instead. The tea soothed my throat but I was still sniffling and started to feel achy.

By closing time, I felt like crap. I could barely muster up the energy to walk to the metro. The ride home was miserable. I picked Darrius up and once I got home, I crashed on the couch. I've gotten up a couple of times to fix dinner and use the bathroom. And grab my laptop. I have to stay connected to the world.

I have a slight fever - 100.2 - not bad. My throat is still sore and I have a dry cough. I'm cold and my eyeballs feel like they are on FIRE!

Needless to say, I didn't train today. I'm hoping this is a 24 hour thing and I will feel better tomorrow.

Please, oh please, don't let this be the flu. Unfortunately, there's a flu outbreak in Virginia. I don't get the flu shot. I'm just keeping my fingers crossed that this is the common cold and I'll be feeling fine in a couple of days.

KEEPING FINGERS CROSSED!

Heaven - Pt. 2

Our heroine is with her new family - Cal and Kitty Dennison - and headed to their home in Atlanta. Heaven is amazed at the new sights she sees along the way. They arrive at their home and Heaven is awestruck by the house. It was completely different from the cabin in the hills. Kitty shows off her prize possessions - ceramic animals that she makes herself. Kitty is very particular about her house and everything must be spotless. This should cause warning bells to go off in Heaven's head but it doesn't. Kitty sends Cal to K-Mart to buy Heaven some clothes. While Cal is away, Kitty tells Heaven that she needs to take a bath and get all the hill filth off her body. This bath consists of scorching hot water, Lysol and a brush. After fighting Kitty and eventually getting pushed into the tub, Heaven is bathed and scrubbed until her skin is raw. Kitty also uses some gunk to wash Heaven's hair and it gets tangled and matted on her head. After drying off using a white towel (pink towels are Kitty's, black towels belong to Cal, Heaven must use the white or faded pink towels), Heaven puts on one of her new gowns. Kitty then informs everyone that Heaven will be sleeping in the bed with her and Cal because hill girls do nasty things and you can't trust them.

Heaven is confused by Kitty's erratic behavior. She hopes that Kitty will be a good mother and that Cal will be the father she always wanted. That seems to be the running them in this book. Heaven looking for a father figure. Well she's not going to find it in Cal. He's sympathetic and tries to protect her from Kitty's madness, but he doesn't take a stand against Kitty because he's in debt to her. She has him by the balls because she helped get his TV repair business started. Heaven spends her time going to school and coming home and cleaning. On Saturdays, Cal treats Heaven to a dinner and a movie and shopping excursions. Sounds like a good old-fashioned date to me. They become closer; two wounded souls who have to put up with the abusiveness of Kitty.

The closeness between Heaven and Cal reaches the point of inappropriateness. Heaven and Cal kiss. Heaven knows that it's wrong but she doesn't want to push him away because he's the only good thing she got going in her life. She's lost her family and the love of her life. The only person she can depend on is Cal. And she's heard Kitty tell Cal "NO" so often and she didn't want to do that to him. So they have sex and Heaven feels like a slut. She starts to think that it's in her blood to be trampy.

Heaven has been living with the Dennison's for two years. Kitty develops breast cancer and they return to Winnerow to let her family take care of her. There Heaven hopes to see Tom and Fanny. She visits Fanny with no luck. Fanny shuts the door in Heaven's face. It turns out Fanny's pregnant with the Reverand's baby. She's going to sell the baby to the Rev and his wife for $10k and then go to New York City (why? i don't know) Heaven sees Tom and discovers that his life isn't as great as he said it was. Buck Henry works him to death and he hates it. Heaven sees Logan and keeps him at bay. She's a ruined woman after letting Cal have his way with her. Heaven more or less tell Logan that's she's not the innocent he thought she was and he runs away, not wanting to hear it.

Pa is back in the picture and it seems he's finally got his life together. He has a new wife. Tom wants to go live with Pa and try to be a family again. This pisses Heaven off. She feels betrayed. She wants Tom to go with her to Boston so that she can see her mother's parents so that she can claim her heritage. It's a no go. Heaven says good bye to Tom and Fanny. She hops on the plan, off to a better future. Hopefully.

Bitten by the lazy bug

I admit it. I've been lazy. Big Time! I did go out of town last weekend so I wasn't able to go to the gym but I still have not felt motivated to train. I'm not going to make any progress if I let laziness take over. I don't know if it's really laziness or just a case of the winter blahs. Either way, I need to dig deep and find a way to drag myself back to the gym. I am going to attempt to go this evening. I'm keeping my fingers crossed that I can fight the Big Lazy.

Road Trip!

Every February we go to a "ski" resort called Massanutten located in Harrisonburg, VA. My father-in-law owns a timeshare there and it has become a family tradition. We snow tube every time we go. The resort uses man-made snow because Virginia doesn't get enough snow to keep the mountain covered. Darrius loves it. There's also snow boarding, skiing, an indoor waterpark and a golf course (for summer visitors). It's a nice, quiet family-oriented place. We arrived Friday and stayed through Sunday. It was unusually warm for this time of year - 65 degrees warm to be exact. But this didn't stop us from slush tubing. Couldn't really call it snow because of the heat and the sun, the snow was melting. We had fun anyway as you can see from my video of me going down the hill. The snow tubing is organized; you buy tickets for a two hour block. And let cattle we're herded up the mountain on this slow "escalator" type device. Then you get in line (there are 7 lanes) and you wait for your turn. It was fun for us - maybe because we don't know any better?

Me on the snow tube...spinning and spinning and spinning!

Darrius was allowed to bring a friend - Jaylin. It was great because we didn't have to entertain him.

We will be going back next February. I just hope the weather cooperates and it will be cold! We were all sweating in our snow suits. Now that wasn't fun.

Heaven - Part I

I've finished the first half of Heaven. I thought a good stopping point is when Heaven is sold by her father to a young couple - The Dennison's - from Atlanta. While reading this book, I wondered if VCA wrote this book, wanting the readers to have sympathy for Heaven and her rough life in the hills of West Virginia? If so, she failed miserably. Personally, I found Heaven too whiny. If I could yell at her and tell her to get it together, I would. Now onto my summary:

Prologue: On the eve of Heaven's 10th birthday, she finds out from her Granny that Sarah really isn't her ma. Granny takes Heaven to a grave. It's the grave of Heaven's mother who died at the age of 14 during childbirth. Granny goes on to tell Heaven the story of how Heaven's mother ran away from home and end up meeting and falling in love with Luke. Apparently, Luke was devastated by the death of his angel and this caused him to completely ignore Heaven. This bit of information gives Heaven some insight as to why her Pa doesn't look at or speak to her. Granny explains how Pa came to be with Sarah shortly after his angel's death. He had cravins, physical cravins. Granny gives Heaven the suitcase her mother was carrying when she arrived in The Willies. The suitcase contained a doll with silvery blond hair wearing a wedding veil. It was Heaven's ma, Luke's angel that was named Leigh.

The book starts with Heaven, a 13 year old girl that lives in abject poverty with her Granny, Grandpa, her 4 siblings (Tom, Fanny, Keith and Our Jane) and her "mother" Sarah. They are poor hill folk. Her Pa, Luke, is in and out of their life. He shows up long enough to deliver food and have sex with Sarah. They don't know where he goes when he leaves but according to Sarah, he rolls out to go to Shirley's Place. Heaven is extremely close with her brother Tom. It could be because they are so close in age. How is that possible? Tom calls her Heavenly (even though her name is Heaven Leigh). Their sister Fanny is a whore in the making. She loves attention, hates Heaven and thinks that the only way to get boys to like her is to go into the closet with them and perform favors. Keith is quiet and I don't think he said more than a sentence in the first half of the book. Our Jane is babied by all because she was born sickly.

The only place where Heaven gets a respite from her poor life is when she goes to school. Everyday Heaven, Tom, Fanny, Keith and Our Jane walk 7 miles to go to school. Heaven and Tom have the same teacher, Miss Deale, who "specializes" in teaching hill folk. Heaven loves Miss Deale. Miss Deale makes sure to encourage their book learning by giving them books to take home and read because she knows that they can't afford to buy any. Things get better for Heaven at school when Tom introduces her to the new boy in school, Logan. His family owns the local drug store so you know he comes from money. Their eyes meet and Logan has fallen head over heels for the girl with the cornflower blue eyes. Wow! That was fast. Of course, Fanny does not like this and does everything to draw attention to herself. Unfortunate for her, Logan only has eyes for Heaven.

Things continue on, business as usual, until Sarah realizes one day that she's knocked up. When she tells Luke, he blows up at her. He gave her birth control pills so why wasn't she taking them? She didn't understand his instructions and took them all at once so she wouldn't forget. Well, that's one way to do it. Luke leaves again to his normal hangout. While he's gone, Sarah prays that she will provide him with a son that looks just like Luke. That will get him to stay. Not! Sarah goes into labor and gives birth - no Luke in sight. But something's wrong with the baby. It's funny looking. OMG! The baby's stillborn. Sarah goes into a tizzy. Granny dies. And Luke finally shows up and drops a bombshell - He has syphilis. His nasty ways killed Sarah's baby. And his Ma! Luke takes off again.

Sarah goes bat-shit crazy and starts mumbling to herself about how she has to get out of here. She needs to leave. And guess what? She does. So now the only adult in the cabin is Grandpa and he can't do anything except sit in his rocker and whittle. Heaven stops going to school so that she can take care of Grandpa and the sickly Our Jane. Fanny uses this as an excuse to not go to school also. Things get rough. Food runs low. It's winter and it's making hunting tough. Keith and Our Jane are whiny and cry because their belly hurts. Oh when is Pa coming back with food? Surely he wouldn't let his kids starve? In the nick of time, Pa shows up with a bag full of food. Our hero! And he's out the door again. He don't want his kids to catch the syphilis.

Pa returns just in time for Christmas Eve. He has a big surprise for his brood. Christmas presents? A winter coat? New shoes? NO! A new family! Ta-dah! Luke figured since he got more kids than he can support, why not sell them off to a family that don't have kids for the bargain price of $500 per child. The first kid to be sold is Our Jane and Keith. You can't break them up; they are a package deal. Heaven is sick with grief as Our Jane cries "Hev-lee!" Heaven hates her father even more and gives him the death stare. Fanny is pissed because she wasn't sold first. She has to get outta here! I should have been first! And Tom can't believe his Pa sold his own kids. Heaven can't believe that Grandpa just sat there and said nothing. Fanny gets her wish. She gets sold to the Reverend and his wife. Next on the block, Tom! He's a sturdy young man who can do go work. Now you go with Buck Henry. Last man standing - Heaven.

Heaven ponders her fate. Now she wishes for Miss Deale or Logan to come to her rescue. Too late now Heaven. Your pride got in the way. You didn't want any help when it was being offered now you are on your own. While Heaven waits for the other shoe to drop, Luke decides that he has the right to touch and feel on Heaven - inappropriately - cause she's from his seed. Yeah...okay. Luckily Grandpa decides to be lucid and stops this. The next day two couples arrive. Heaven has a choice. Which couple to chose. The older staid couple that won't look at her. Or the flashy young couple. Hmmm...who to chose, who to chose. She decides to go with couple #2! Heaven hugs Grandpa, gives Luke another death stare and leaves the raggedy cabin behind. She's now on her way to a better life...or is she?

Stay tuned.....

Day 10 - On a roll!

First let me say: Today is my birthday. Yay me! So I woke up this morning at 4am and dragged my tired 36 year old behind to the gym. I wanted to stay in the bed. It was so nice and toasty inside. And I could hear the cold wind outside. But I told myself to not give in to the comfort and get to the gym.

The first thing I do is get on the treadmill. In my mind I'm hesitant to hop on the 'mill because I don't know if my shins are going to give in to the pain. I start walking, I do my 4 minutes. I up the speed and start running. I make sure to run at a .5% incline. This has really helped ease up the pressure on my shins. I run for 3 minutes and go back to walking. I feel good. A little winded but I'm feeling good. I crank up the speed again and do my second round of running. I start getting tired at the 2 minute mark but I push through. I start walking again. Third time's a charm so I crank up the speed. I start hitting a wall before the 2 minute mark. I'm winded. My shins are talking to me. And I'm tired. I keep looking at the time on the treadmill. I tell myself to stop. I find a spot on the treadmill and just stare at it. Before I knew it, my 3 minutes were up.

Today was a good day. I was able to not give in to the tiredness and the shin pain (which wasn't that bad). Friday is my next day to train. I can't wait!

Happy Birthday to Me

Thirty-six years ago today, I was born at Crittenden Memorial Hospital in West Memphis, Arkansas.

I'm not doing anything special to celebrate my birthday. 36 isn't a special number or a milestone birthday. I'm not excited about being a year older. I'm officially in my mid-30s and I don't like it one bit. In my teens and 20s, I looked forward to celebrating my birthday. I would start making birthday announcements weeks before my birthday. The tide turned when I was 29, getting ready to turn 30. Turning 30 crept up on me. I spotted my first gray hair right before my 30th birthday. I wasn't ready mentally to turn 30. But I didn't have a choice. Time wasn't going to wait for me to prepare myself. I decided to celebrate turning 30 in style. Went to Vegas for a long weekend with friends and partied the entire weekend. It was the best.

I started being okay with being in my early 30s. I was still young. I didn't look my age. I felt great. And then 35 hit. Boom! I felt like I was headed down a slippery slope. I wanted to celebrate turning 35 in style - I wanted to go back to Vegas with friends. Things didn't turn out quite the way I had planned. Vegas trip was scrapped; no one could go. So I decided on Atlantic City. It's within driving distance and it could be an overnight trip. Well, I went to Atlantic City but it was only me and Alfred. I had a decent time but it wasn't the all out party weekend like I had in Vegas.

Thirty-five was an important birthday for me. There were things I wanted to accomplish by the time I'd turned 35. I wanted to have lost the weight I'd gained after having Darrius. I was supposed to have lost this weight back when I turned 30 but that didn't happen. I wanted to have made a career change. I had decided that if I wasn't pregant or in the process of getting pregnant by the time I turned 35, I wasn't going to have anymore kids. I always thought I didn't want anymore kids and the cut-off age was just for show. My decision had already been made a long time ago. But now, here I am, 36 years old, and wondering if that was the best decision. Thanks to medicine and science, I could still have a baby at this age, but do I want to? I sometimes regret that Darrius doesn't have a sibling. Having a brother growing up was great even though we fought all the time. But that's why siblings do. Darrius asks for a little brother or sister now. I can't imagine having an 11 year old and an infant. The age gap....

This birthday I'm feeling reflective and a little melancholy. I don't like getting older. I am going to fight getting older every step of the way. I'm going to continue to color my hair to hide the gray. I will continue to be on the lookout for crows feet and wrinkles. I don't think I'd ever go as far as to get Botox or plastic surgery. That's not my style. But I do intend on trying to keep my youthful appearance for as long as possible without looking like those women on Real Housewives of Orange County. They just take it too damn far!

I'm going to not try to feel sorry for myself on this special day. I feel blessed. I'm alive to see another year. I have a great husband and wonderful son. I have the love and support of my family. And even though it's not my dream job, I have a job that I'm good at and provides a steady paycheck. So it's not all bad. It just gets harder for me each year to feel happy about turning a year older. Maybe once I turn 40, it will be different. BTW - I am not looking forward to turning 40. :-)

Day 9

I've been suffering from a case of the Blechs. After suffering from shin and calf pain, I took a couple of days off from my training. But I hopped back on the saddle yesterday. And it felt good and it felt bad. It felt good because I was able to walk for 4 minutes and run for 3 minutes for 3 sessions. By the time I hit the second round, I was huffing and puffing but I pushed through. On the 3rd round, I wanted to give up. Every time I looked at the time on the treadmill, I wanted to hit the button and slow the treadmill down. But I kept telling myself 2 more minutes, I can do it. And then it would be 1:30 minutes left, then 1 minute, then 30 seconds, until I was done.

I need to stop looking at the time on the treadmill. When I do, it makes it go by slower. And mentally I start giving up. Other than the running, my workouts having been great. I've started weight training 3 times a week and I'm continuing my stretching. It's ironic; I started this so that I can run a 5k but this process has made me more consistent with the other part of getting fit and preparing for this race. I wasn't expecting that.

My objective for this week is: Complete 2 more running sessions. Stop looking at the time while on the treadmill. Push through, don't give up.

Tooth Fairy

Darrius went to the dentist a couple of weeks ago for a cleaning and Dr. Kramer told him that he had 2 loose teeth. At the time, the teeth weren't extremely loose, so Dr. Kramer told Darrius to start wiggling them to help loosen them. When Darrius got home from his appointment, he went to work. Hearing that he had 2 loose teeth got Darrius motivated. He had dollar signs in his eyes. He was already counting the money that he would get with two teeth underneath his pillow.

One week went by and neither tooth came out. Another week and still no tooth. Over this past weekend, Darrius was on a wiggle-fest. He constantly had his fingers in his mouth, wiggling his loose tooth. It got so bad that it was bleeding Sunday night. I told him to give his tooth a rest. It will come out when it's ready. Apparently, the tooth was ready last night. I was in the kitchen fixing dinner and Darrius comes in the kitchen and grabs a paper towel. I immediately ask him if he spilled something. He says no; then I look at him and he has blood on his lip. I'm thinking he hurt himself and I ask him what happened. He said he was trying to pull his tooth out. Oh Lord. Just leave it alone. It will come out when it's ready!

Darrius goes back into his room and a couple of minutes later he comes out, tooth in hand, and proclaims: I got it! I shake my head. I can't believe he pulled it out after I told him to leave it alone. And then Darrius says: Now I'm going to get $5 dollars from the tooth fairy. I remember getting a quarter for my teeth and thinking that was a lot of money.

I hoped I had some ones in my wallet. I only had four so the tooth fairy shorted Darrius a dollar. He'll get over it. We're in a recession. He should be happy he got that much.



This is the pillow that Darrius put his tooth in. There's a real pocket on Batman's utility belt.


Here's the "tooth fairy" retrieving the tooth and leaving the money. Hee hee!